A year 17012012

Posted by Aiden Chan on January 17, 2012 in

Before I start the post, wanna tell you that it’s not a sharing post.
I mean that I’m not going to recommend you a place to visit,
I do sharing here but not something happy I guess =x
Sorry for that, it just a post which to express my feeling and to tell someone before CNY
I will seldom online during my holiday, same issues, I had no Internet access in my home.
It is a post to tell someone about my feeling toward them, it a way so call indirectly =)
You can continue to read it if you don’t mind it.
My sadness and anger may kill your mood, tell you in first, no blame on me please =x

15012011, a day I’ll not forget about it.
I make a decision on the day and I cried like hell before that.
17012012, a year after the day, same reaction again like last year, I’m gonna make a decision again.
The only different was I din cry at all at the moment.

To those who wanna know what I had written on 15012011,
You can search back on my previous post on the day, the title is the date 15012011 if I not mistaken.
I’m not gonna put the link here. Sorry =)

Time move forward without my notice, it was already a year after the day.
I choose to stay away from you since the day and you know the reason I guess.
I try to not have any connection with you in anything like studies, trips, anythings.

God love funny jokes I think, again, we were in the same group for assignment.
I don’t know what to say about it, anyway it’s over.

I feel that you’re trying so hard to get back to me, I mean us (me + sistar).
You joining the new gang before the end of diploma studies life, aren’t you?
And now you choose to leave the gang again like how you do in the previous.

I told myself that I must tell you all the stories before I leave/you leave by face to face.
I didn’t do it at the last. No matter how, I still wanna tell you even in this so called indirectly way.

I feel alone when first come to the strangeness place.
I’m afraid of the environment, people here and anything. I do miss my gang and family so much.
You never know that, I do really treat you as my best friend here and the level is like how my gang was. You’re the only one here who sticks with me the most in the previous.
We do have the longer friendship but yet you do hurt me the most.

I remember every single you said and something I see.
I know I’m the one who ignore you at first when first come here but I do to get I back.
It may be the reason that makes you treat me like this.

There are too much of detail I can’t write it out, my sadness mixing with the anger now.
Wanna let you know, I had tear too much for you and I don’t think it is worth.
I mostly cried for every week and make my friends worry about me.
Thank you to my friends especially sistar, they do support me a lot in this cruel period ever in my life. I can’t imagine how I can survive in that alone. Luckily I do have lot of friends care me even thought the one who not around me.

The first and ever that I make everyone worry about me in this way, keep on message me, fb inbox and so on. Thank you for making me in such FUCKUP situation and let me know my friends are love me.

You said I’m treating you bad,
Yes maybe, I treat you bad till the max like asking my friends to share room with you, and I stay alone in a strangeness place with no one.
I had done a lot for you but you never ever know it.
I guess is not important to you at all, and all of this was my stupid action for you.

I will keep on reading on the previous page and at the moment I will continue to read the next page. When the same problem comes on the next page I will not do wrongly because I remember what I had learned from the previous page. I will still refer to the previous page. This is my reading style.

No more tear for you anymore, no more/anymore.
I thought I understand you so well but at the end I just found out how stupid I am.

I still trust you since the day you come back but you still in the same concept, FUCKUP your 2 is better than 1 theory. Oh gosh, I still believe you and this is 3rd time you did it please FUCKOFF and go away.

I still treat you as my friends but yet you told other you had no friends. Thank you god, I lost a friend I think. Do you know what mean of boycott? Please think before you told the others.

I’m foolish that try to get away from your new gang and keep quiet so that you can mix with your new gang. Try to not involve of your new life and make myself suffer.
How stupid I’m,
Luckily I din follow it if not I’m gonna lost a gang of friends.

You are trying to boycott me in many ways I know and I feel it.
Try to not talk with me, try to ignore me and try your best to get away from me.
I know it, I feel it and I get it. Thank you for hurting so so much.

It was fucking funny when you’re trying to talk with me when nobody answers you.
What a funny joke ever I had heard before.

It is totally different with the previous post; I do really written the previous post with the leave in peace feeling.
But it is freaking different now, I guess you know it,

I FUCKING HATE YOU NOW.

Whatever you said, your voice or any single word/thing you touch I also hate it.

My friends told me, just ignore you and if I do like this way, it still loves you as in bad manner.
Thank you to my friends, I know you guy are caring me so much.
But I do willing to love him/you in the bad manner =)

No one can hurt me like how you do ever in my life, more worst than the Demon couple.
You are also the only one I hate till the max.
Thank you for the hurt so much in order to create the dark side of mine.

I do really treat you like my little brother previously but no more.
I think you don’t need a friend like me I guess. But no worries, I swear you will never ever find someone like me and my sistar.

Don’t trust your so called friend!?
Oh man, please, you don’t even know what mean of friends.

As in your define of the term “friends”,
I think it means betray, can fall for two girls who are best sister/friends so that make the 2 sisters relation get worst, or else it may means that someone you can mix with when you need and leave away and come back again as you LIKE.

FUCKYOU.

Don’t keep on asking me how my friends recently,
Why not I ask you, how your friends recently do?

Please think clearly, I have no such big power like what you said, INFLUENCE THE OTHERS.
I’m not god okay, and yet I’m just an ordinary boy who damn girlish.
This is because can trust no you.

I do really hateyounow more, you are not what you said and you do what you DON’T say.
Luckily I leave you early, my friends and sistar so proud of me I know it =D

Thank you my friends, ipoh, kl, Kampar, bitches fiction gang and sistar.
My supporter always and thank you for treat me like a real friends but not so call friends.

I’m not the kind of person to bear anyone a grudge but I do remember any single things my friends had done to me.
Every single word my friends said I do remember no matter it hurt me or loves me.

In conclusion,

I’m satisfied with my life now like how you said last time. =)

I din give up you but you’re the one who give up on me at first.